A question often asked by bridal couples is whether it is acceptable to use the monogram of the married couple's name on their wedding invite. The simple and correct answer is "No!"
While there are lots of wedding invitations that now use monograms, it isn't correct etiquette and does not make a lot of common sense. Simply stated , "It is not suitable to use your 'married name ' monogram, as the couple isn't really married at the time the wedding invitation is sent." Some self-appointed "do your own thing" etiquette experts might disagree, but common sense dictates otherwise.
Others simply feel it's bad "Juju" and that one may jinx the wedding by anticipating the wedding ceremony that has not yet been officially recognized by either civil or spiritual authorities. To most experienced stationery store owners, the solution to this query is pretty straight-forward. Therefore , it was quite surprising that a Crane & Co. wedding invitation sample featured a beautifully embossed monogram in their recently released Wedding Invitations Album.
Naturally, oneassumed that there was a "boo-boo" since the monogram initials did not seem to have anything in common with the names of the wedding couple. After some forensic science, specifically reading the footnotes, we found out that the beautiful engraged monogram was the monogram of the mother of the bride! In a note citing Crane's Blue Book (the reference source of choice for wedding invitation wording and etiquette), Crane states that "As the social hostess for the family, the bride's mother's monogram is historically printed on the invitation."
The origins of this custom needs further research. To be fair, some experienced stationers feel the mother's lovely monogram may overshadow the importance of her daughter's marriage. Common sense suggests that it might be more appropriate to let the attention fall on the bridal couple.
While monograms are good for wedding stationery or maybe the menu at the wedding reception, it is perhaps best to simply avoid the utilization of monograms on wedding invitations.
While there are lots of wedding invitations that now use monograms, it isn't correct etiquette and does not make a lot of common sense. Simply stated , "It is not suitable to use your 'married name ' monogram, as the couple isn't really married at the time the wedding invitation is sent." Some self-appointed "do your own thing" etiquette experts might disagree, but common sense dictates otherwise.
Others simply feel it's bad "Juju" and that one may jinx the wedding by anticipating the wedding ceremony that has not yet been officially recognized by either civil or spiritual authorities. To most experienced stationery store owners, the solution to this query is pretty straight-forward. Therefore , it was quite surprising that a Crane & Co. wedding invitation sample featured a beautifully embossed monogram in their recently released Wedding Invitations Album.
Naturally, oneassumed that there was a "boo-boo" since the monogram initials did not seem to have anything in common with the names of the wedding couple. After some forensic science, specifically reading the footnotes, we found out that the beautiful engraged monogram was the monogram of the mother of the bride! In a note citing Crane's Blue Book (the reference source of choice for wedding invitation wording and etiquette), Crane states that "As the social hostess for the family, the bride's mother's monogram is historically printed on the invitation."
The origins of this custom needs further research. To be fair, some experienced stationers feel the mother's lovely monogram may overshadow the importance of her daughter's marriage. Common sense suggests that it might be more appropriate to let the attention fall on the bridal couple.
While monograms are good for wedding stationery or maybe the menu at the wedding reception, it is perhaps best to simply avoid the utilization of monograms on wedding invitations.
About the Author:
Richard May is a Founding Member of the Stationers Guild and a co-owner of Therese Saint Clair, a stationery store found in Greenwich, CT.
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