7/10/12

Internet Dating - Don't Forget To Have Fun

By Jayde Johanssen


There is a lot of advice and information about internet dating out there. Trying to digest it all can be quite difficult and even scary if you get caught up in too much of the "What can go wrong" type of information out there.

As such, in this article I am going to try and give you some internet dating tips that make things easy again. After all, it should be fun, not scary or confusing. So here are my top 3 top internet dating tips:

1. Before you start dating online, there are 2 things you need to think about. Firstly, think about the qualities you are looking for in your partner. Secondly, think about the experience you are looking for. When reflecting on these two things, try to do it on your own, without accepting advice from anyone.

You will get a lot of advice from people when you start to go down this route. IGNORE them. They have all kinds of different and irrelevant motivations for giving you their advice. You are the only one who knows what is right for you right now though.

Trust your own judgement and enjoy the results of your own decisions. Every date will not work out perfectly and we all have relationships which fail. But this is a good thing. It helps you understand yourself, learn what you need in life and recognise it when it arrives. Much better you learn these lessons for you rather than learn someone else's lessons.

2. When you know what type of person and experience you are looking for, go to a dating site which specifically addresses those qualifications. There are many dating sites out there which cater to specifics. As such, you can dramatically increase your chances of dating success by starting with a dating site which pre-qualifies your potential dates, along the lines of the qualities you are looking for.

If you know who you are looking for and join up at a regular dating site, you are going to have to deal with all the people you don't want to meet, before you find the people you do want to meet. All those profiles and emails you will have to waste time on. Why bother when you can cut many people you do not want to meet out of the equation, simply by joining a website which has already done it for you. For example, if you want to meet someone of christian faith, you can join a christian dating site and not deal with non-christians. If you love Asian culture and that is high on your list, join an Asian dating site. If you are looking for a fast paced steamy experience, an adult dating site is the answer. Or a more sophisticated experience, maybe a site which caters to the wealthy is the one for you. Each of these niche dating sites appeal to a certain type of person and experience and filters out others. This should make your life easier.

My third and final tip is to always keep it safe. You'll never have a fun time if you're not feeling safe. So apply common sense and your own set of safety precautions to all real life dating experiences.

Dating has a number of stages, online dating adds a few extra stages. Each is a natural progression of "opening up" as trust is built. It starts with emails. Once trust is built, telephone numbers can be exchanged. Then when trust is built, dates in public places. Then, as more trust is built, private time together. There is no standard time scale for running through these progressions, its however fast the couple in the situation want it to be. If for any reason though, trust has not been built at one of the stages, do not progress to the next level of intimacy until it does. How can you ever feel safe if the trust doesn't exit?

After that first meeting you are no longer internet dating, so your experience should progress along the same lines as any developing relationship.

Dating should always be fun, you are finding out about yourself and others. For greatest success though remember - Safe, Specific and Simple.




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