3/7/11

How To Endure Emotional Pains

By Johnny K. Peterson


We all live and consider ourselves as humans because we have emotions. Our actions are most of the time based on how we feel and how we connect with other people using our emotions. Sometimes, it may end up being a hurtful experience for us and some would rather move away from that experience while others head full on to conquer that painful emotion. Each and every person is different so there are also different ways for people to deal with the pain.

Feeling emotional pain is normal for a human being. Everyday, we feel the bout of pain that a person has done to us and yet we are still alive. People experience and perceive pain in different ways. An experience that is painful for you might not be painful for others.

List down the things that you are thankful for and this should include the hardships as well as the pain you are feeling right now. Be thankful and learn to appreciate life as well as pain as it is a full circle. We all feel pain and yet it is in that pain that we tend to become stronger.

Be more aware of your feelings. Identify each and every emotion you are feeling as you will learn how to deal with them when the time comes. The more you are in tune to your feelings the more you will be able to handle them once they come.

There is only one cure for the pain and the hurtful feelings you are carrying and that is time. Time helps heal all wounds they say and you should allow time to do it. Never hold grudges to anyone as it will only prolong the agony.

Talk to your friends and family if you are in pain. They will surely understand what you are going through right now and they will have something to say to help you cope up with the feelings you have. Learn to trust them and feel free to speak to them.

Allow yourself to be in pain but not all the time. Do not let it consume your entire being and let it not be the sole purpose for living your life. Tell yourself that you are only going to feel the pain for a couple of minutes every day and then breathe and let it all pass you.

Do not let the pain consume your entire being. Let it not dictate who you really are as a person because each and every person has the right to be happy. No one in this world would want to feel sad and alone all the time.




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Saving A Relationship Requires Special Steps

By Russell Strider


Saving a relationship is really a necessity when you are fully aware that the other man or woman is well worth it. No intimate relationship is perfect, and many will always have their ups and downs like a rollercoaster ride. Any time it gets to the bottom most part, you should do something to be able to save it - that is, if it is worth saving.

It's always a good idea to give each and every relationship at least a second chance, though a third and a fourth chance is not really required. But when you really know it's truly worth saving, then by all means try and do so. Any kind of fight just may very well be a miscommunication, a problem because of the long life of your partnership, or perhaps a lack of understanding and patience. Don't ever behave like a child, act your own age and don't let childish concerns run havoc. Who are we that cannot forgive? That we can't offer other people second chances?

If you, however, decide to give a person a second chance (or a third or fourth), make sure that you are not compromising your personal convictions. Be certain that you are compromising intelligently. In the event that, for instance, the other person is a drug or an alcohol abuser and has had far too many relapses, you need to know better than to give a second chance, as such a situation could be adversely affecting your life in quite a few ways.

If he doesn't desire to help himself, or refuses to become a better man, then you know you deserve a much better relationship apart from him. If he continues hurting you again and again, then saving the relationship may do more harm than good, and will ultimately take its toll on you. The point is that you in addition need to save somebody, and that is yourself. You have to give your own self the love you need to have before you can genuinely love another person, or before it's really possible to try to save someone else.

Evaluate your intimate relationship to begin with. Make certain that it is definitely worthy of saving. And most importantly, once your partner shows or has shown that he is worthy of being offered forgiveness and a shot at an additional chance, then be willing to do so. Also, make sure to see the relationship in an objective light and don't view things with rose colored glasses. You have to be as honest as possible, free from your individual biases and self centeredness as well.

The real key to saving a relationship is to work on it once you have both cooled off. Think about it when emotions aren't high, when time has at least offered you the time to think things over. And finally, saving a relationship isn't a one way street. Each of you must keep fighting for the intimate relationship and also for the fire to continue burning.




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Issues That Will Crop Up When Two Families Merge

By Cynthia Trueblood


The blended marriages are a common thing these days and it really creates a mixed family where the children from the previous marriage are also included. Such blended families have a major difference as compared to the normal family i.e. the children may belong to the husband or the wife.

It is not easy for any child to replace the parent as a result of some family breakage. Similarly, for the step parents, it is not so easy to give the attention and care to the children as their own parents had given them in the past.

The newly born siblings as a result of the second marriage can create several problems and can make the relationship more complex.

The children have different parental background in the mixed family and this causes problems with their attitudes, they feel very angry, upset and sometimes jealous. There is a race type competition developed within the siblings of mixed family.

The parents should try to work on the new relationship and its complexities that are arisen as a result of the second marriage. This is very important to have a well balanced and healthy family life. The below mentioned ways will help you in this regard:

It is necessary to spend some good time with the family. Parents should try to spend more time with the children; this will help them understand their feelings and emotions.

You can also handle the situation caused by the blended marriage by arranging some get together and the mixed children should be given time to adjust in the new environment.

You can also arrange some conversations with them and listen to their problems; you can also motivate them to discuss their problems and share their feelings with you. This will have a positive impact in their feelings and they will realize that you are concerned in all the mess that has just happened in their lives.




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Jerks or Nice Guy - What Gets You More Dates?

By Mike Morton


It can be hard to guess if a woman likes you. But there are some ways to know if you and the girl you're dating actually have a future together. There's really no clear-cut way to figure it out, but women have a few habits that usually come out when they like a guy.

Sometimes a girl just needs a man in her life, more often for friendship over a romantic relationship. Maybe she wants to just give you a chance because she's tired of spending Friday nights alone. If you seem like a nice guy to her, she might just be afraid of putting you down. But doesn't it help to know if she really likes you or not?

When a woman's body language seems to be a little off after a few dates, then she may already like you. Sometimes girls would have difficulty saying things and might feel a little awkward around a guy they like because they're a lot more self-conscious about what they say and do.

Look at the way she flirts. If it's to get information from you, then she might want to know if the feeling is mutual. If your flirting moves catch her off-guard, then she might like you.

If she starts talking more about her family or her personal life, then she already trusts you. Check out her reaction when you talk about the same topics. If you see that sparkle in her eyes and you sense that she's listening to your every word and getting animated in her conversation, then she might just be into you.

Girls tell their friends everything. You don't have to ask them about her because chances are, if she likes you, she would ask them to talk to you for her or at least fish around for information.

Girls can be really confusing. Sometimes you just know that they like you because of the gut feeling a situation gives you. Usually their words or actions can betray how they really feel. You have to learn to read in between the lines too.

Set aside your ego and find out more about her. Be open to possibilities. Don't be too scared to find out if your dating will lead to something else. So if you think that a girl may be interested in you, and you feel the same way, then go for it!




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Ideas On How To Look For The Right Marriage Counseling

By Jacob Michaels


Just to think about marriage counseling seems to distress people, especially if it is somehow suggested that they might need it. Should you find yourself in a situation where marriage counseling is truly warranted, treat the matter with the utmost seriousness because you may well be in a position to save your marriage. Counseling is actually a good way of getting to the bottom of some problems so that a couple may move on having gotten rid of them.

If and when you have decided to look for a marriage counselor, start by looking for ways to check out their credentials. What sort of higher education did they receive to qualify them for doing what they are doing now? What sort of expertise comes up when you do a background check? What's their success rate available by way of statistics?

Since marriage counseling can cost quite a bit of money, you should also check with your insurance company. If you are not blessed enough to have it covered, you don't want to get stuck by a bunch of bills that you couldn't afford to honor with your payments. If your insurance will cover the costs to a point, make sure you realize what your end of the deal is going to be before signing the dotted line.

But if you don't even have insurance and cannot pay for the counseling yourself, it may be possible for you to locate local mental health places that could make their services available to you at a cost that's affordable. If this should be the case, consider yourself lucky and do go for the counseling that may well save your marriage.

Most churches have this type of service available to their members. If you go to church on a regular basis, you might find the proper kind of counseling right there. Churches can also have group sessions that may be rather helpful. You may interact with other couples in a group setting that could well help you work out some of your own problems.

There is no point in trying to struggle with problems in your marriage if marriage counseling can be there for you. Such counseling is usually like a safe place to fall when the chips are down. It is a way of getting positive reinforcement in your effort to save your own marriage.




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