One of the biggest issues I have to deal with when it comes to my students is the idea that they are too ugly to attract women.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
I want to take a moment and dispel a few attraction myths that hold men back from achieving success in their love life.
Myth #1 - You must be good looking to attract women.
Take a good look around and take not of the different types of men who date attractive women, and you can see this is not true. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
Well, you can't help if you're good looking or not. But you have COMPLETE control over how you present yourself. You control the type of clothes you wear, how you groom yourself, how you wear your hair, how you smell, etc. Presentations of these types of features play a role in looking good. Even the most average looking guy can be attractive when he takes control of his appearance.
Myth #2 - Women and Men Think Alike
It's natural to assume that everyone else in the world sees things the same way you see them.
Take for instance that huge pimple on your forehead, you think everyone notices it, although it is beneath the skin and no one knows it is there besides you.
You naturally assume that women size you up in the same manner.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
To women, attraction is based more around how men make them feel, rather than how the men look. That is why women are attracted to confidence and social status. They're attracted to men who make them laugh. They're attracted to men who are good at what they do. See how this works? Looks have very little to do with any of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Men's Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
A lot of guys try and dismiss their insecurities by calling attention to it, as if to try and "diffuse" whatever it is they feel is ugly about them. But all this does is draw the woman's attention to this insecurity, and only at that point do people notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. In order for your positive qualities to outshine those that you find negative, you must always face every situation with a focus on your good qualities rather than any insecurity.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Those men have their own set of problems with women. Clearly in the beginning being attractive physically does help, however they have the same issues as the rest of us.
Attraction is the magnification of the emotional connection a woman feels while in your presence, you can build this connection in such a manner that the woman only feels this way when she is with you. Consequently, she will want to have you around her.
If a woman meets a man who matches her physical type, she is attracted to him, since her preference of features brings her enjoyment. Nevertheless, if the man is incompatible, boring or a jerk, her feelings will vanish.
Do you know that a woman may not at first find a man to be physically attractive and then somehow experience thrilling fun and pleasure; she will become attracted to him in time?
Others want to be around you when you make them feel good; this is one of the basics of attraction.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
When you begin to lead a woman down the path of sexual attraction, even if you don't look like Brad Pitt, she's going to begin to see you in a whole new light - despite any of the shortcomings you may think you have.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
I want to take a moment and dispel a few attraction myths that hold men back from achieving success in their love life.
Myth #1 - You must be good looking to attract women.
Take a good look around and take not of the different types of men who date attractive women, and you can see this is not true. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
Well, you can't help if you're good looking or not. But you have COMPLETE control over how you present yourself. You control the type of clothes you wear, how you groom yourself, how you wear your hair, how you smell, etc. Presentations of these types of features play a role in looking good. Even the most average looking guy can be attractive when he takes control of his appearance.
Myth #2 - Women and Men Think Alike
It's natural to assume that everyone else in the world sees things the same way you see them.
Take for instance that huge pimple on your forehead, you think everyone notices it, although it is beneath the skin and no one knows it is there besides you.
You naturally assume that women size you up in the same manner.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
To women, attraction is based more around how men make them feel, rather than how the men look. That is why women are attracted to confidence and social status. They're attracted to men who make them laugh. They're attracted to men who are good at what they do. See how this works? Looks have very little to do with any of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Men's Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
A lot of guys try and dismiss their insecurities by calling attention to it, as if to try and "diffuse" whatever it is they feel is ugly about them. But all this does is draw the woman's attention to this insecurity, and only at that point do people notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. In order for your positive qualities to outshine those that you find negative, you must always face every situation with a focus on your good qualities rather than any insecurity.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Those men have their own set of problems with women. Clearly in the beginning being attractive physically does help, however they have the same issues as the rest of us.
Attraction is the magnification of the emotional connection a woman feels while in your presence, you can build this connection in such a manner that the woman only feels this way when she is with you. Consequently, she will want to have you around her.
If a woman meets a man who matches her physical type, she is attracted to him, since her preference of features brings her enjoyment. Nevertheless, if the man is incompatible, boring or a jerk, her feelings will vanish.
Do you know that a woman may not at first find a man to be physically attractive and then somehow experience thrilling fun and pleasure; she will become attracted to him in time?
Others want to be around you when you make them feel good; this is one of the basics of attraction.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
When you begin to lead a woman down the path of sexual attraction, even if you don't look like Brad Pitt, she's going to begin to see you in a whole new light - despite any of the shortcomings you may think you have.
About the Author:
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