2/13/11

Infidelity Statistics May Be Extremely Misleading

By Darrell Mills


Statistics can be helpful however, when it comes to hot topics such as infidelity, statistics should be taken along with a healthy pinch of salt.

This isn't to state that the majority of infidelity statistics are completely bogus however as someone with a background in research, I am aware of just how readily good solid data may be twisted after it hits the streets, so to speak.

The reason this happens - with all kinds of statistics - is that they can be a valuable resource for selling more magazines, self-help guides and motivating visitors to click through to websites. And of course when infidelity statistics are "astonishing", "shocking" or "worrying" they do a much better job of this.

Putting an attention-grabbing angle on authentic cheating facts is easy. It's just a matter of presenting them at face value, outside of context or "happening" to misunderstand or misinterpret the information.

Adding to the problem is that startling cheating statistics get copied again and again, crowding out more reliable information about what is truly happening.

The result is that many would have you believe that cheating is a far greater problem than it really is and that marriage success rates are much lower than they really are.

And this manipulation of the facts concerns me

A lot of people looking for infidelity facts are searching for support, advice and reassurance of some kind. For example, to find out the likelihood that their husband or wife really is cheating, or if there is any hope of salvaging their marriage. It is hardly useful or comforting to be fooled into believing the answers are "yes, they most likely are" and "no, probably not".

Regrettably, determining which statistics are trustworthy and which are not isn't so easy. In most cases there are no references to the original research so it is not possible to clarify the information or check if it was a high-quality study.

However, here are a few steps you can take

One is to use that large pinch of salt - be suspicious regarding the most widely-published and "startling" infidelity statistics. For instance, question unexplained phrases such as "extramarital affair". Does this refer to sexual intercourse only, to any sexual activity including a one-time drunken kiss at a party, or does it include emotional affairs too?

Secondly, dig deep and get to the high quality studies that have been crowded out by the "attention grabbers". Thankfully, there have been many large-scale quality studies conducted over the years, and their quality and reliability is shown in the simple fact that their findings are very similar.

Thirdly, remember that even the most reliable studies - consistently carried out with large numbers of men and women over several years - acknowledge their own limitations. The bottom line is , they rely on people confessing to acts of infidelity, and definitions of infidelity vary widely. All experts agree - 100% reliable statistics on cheating are not attainable.

As a final note, infidelity statistics can be helpful, and they can certainly be intriguing but at the end of the day, they do make reference to other people. They are certainly not a reliable indicator of how cheating may or could impact your relationship.




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