3/9/11

How To Take Good Care Of Your Marriage

By Sheila Mathews


Relationships are not easy to maintain but are even harder when couples do not communicate with each other properly. Many relationships break down due to the lack of communication which is a major factor in arousing feelings of loneliness, frustration, and bitterness - nothing good for a relationship.

By contrast, couples who communicate successfully with each other usually have balanced and harmonious relationships. They are able to express love and appreciation freely which are factors that strengthen a relationship.

To improve their lines of communication, couples should be willing to change their communication patterns. With open hearts they should be mindful of the ways that they come off to each other in their speech and in their actions as well as reactions. Bad communication habits should be eliminated and replaced with successful ones.

Many times words and actions are opposite of each other. While nice words might come out of the mouth, the actions that accompany it can be negative. When this happens, the listener is drawn more to interpreting the actions as opposed to words.

An example is when you compliment her jacket but say it with a frown. This is an instance when words do not match the action. The action invalidates the words and thus becomes the opposite.

Sometimes, couples do not notice that they are sending out these conflicting signals. Soon, the method of communication becomes habitual and they end up being unsatisfied with being around each other. Arguments then erupt.

If couples are really committed to their relationship, then they need to make a conscious effort to change the way they talk to each other. Patience, love, and a desire to better the way they related to each other are needed. Though it may sound simple, changing the way you communicate can actually be a hard process.

One way to make the process easier is to go to a relationship councilor who can work with the couple to point out where they start sending wrong messages. These people are trained professionals who can give clarity to their communication deficiencies and suggest ways to modify or resolve it.




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