6/23/11

Are You Afraid to Approach Women?

By Seth Czerepak


Picture this familiar scenario. You're at a public spot. Possibly a coffee shop, bookstore, or supermarket.
You notice an attractive girl at a distance, and feel the desire to approach. Almost as quickly as you experience this
urge, an additional sensation appears to seize control. Fear. Fear of rejection, fear of making a fool of yourself, and
concern that you won't know precisely what you should say. With this fear in your mind, you go about doing that which you were
doing before, and skip your chance. After the opportunity is passed, you are full of regret. You
had a fantastic chance to approach an attractive lady, but you turned it down due to anxiety! You now will
never find out anything about this lady, because you never approached her!

This scenario is all too frequent. It is often generally known as "approach anxiety," because as soon as you
think about approaching a stylish lady, you become incredibly anxious and nervous. So how is it possible to
remove this nervousness? How can you become efficient at approaching attractive women? Well, first you
have to make a simple realization.

Feasible Emotional Outcomes From an Approach

When faced with the opportunity to approach a woman, there are three feasible emotional outcomes.
These outcomes are the emotions of achievement, failing, and regret. If you actually approach the woman, there
are only two possible feelings: success and failure. By simply approaching a woman, you get rid of the
possibility of regret. You'll never really feel regret for approaching a women, even if it goes terribly! Why is
this? Because you truly tried! You had the bravery to approach, so you will never regret the fact that
you didn't approach.

Now, consider the second bad psychological feeling, failure. Should you approach a girl, and she turns you down,
you can say that you failed. But did you truly? No. It's never failure so long as you take the courage to
take action. If you do fall short once you approach a woman, you will get more knowledge. You will understand
what not to do, as well as how to proceed the next time. Good judgement only comes by means of failure, as well as understanding
what not to do.

Regret: A Feeling with No Upsides

Once you make the choice to approach a woman, you've succeeded. You've used courage to speak to
a girl, and whether or not this was a good results or a failure, you've learned from it, as well as moved on. However, what
takes place if you don't approach the lady? Regret. You will really feel regret, and it will be there forever. It can't
disappear! You will never understand what could've been, so you can never have any feeling of satisfaction or
closure. Your entire life, whenever you think back to that instant, you will experience regret. Because of this,
the sensation of failure is definitely much better than regret.

So next time you're given the chance to approach a girl, look at the possible outcomes. Understand
that failure isn't a poor feeling. Realize the only real bad emotion in this scenario is regret, which is the
emotion you'll certainly feel if you don't approach. Due to this, you'll be able to realize that by
approaching, you are really saving yourself from the damaging experience.




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