Compare your relationship

By Chris Dawson

This is a couple activity designed to identify and look at how your relationship compares to other couples, such as your friends. In comparing your marriage with others, you have the opportunity to identify the strengths of your relationship along with areas that can require a little attention.

An important outcome of this easy activity is to become aligned in your relationship goals. By finding areas of relationship weakness you'll have an opportunity to strengthen these areas.

Step 1. Individually take a sheet a paper and jot down the names of four different couples that you both know reasonably well. Next write down four different couples that you know but aren't as acquainted with;

Step 2. Individually write the names in three headings of great, poor and moderate relationships;

Step 3. Now tell each other why you placed the couples under those headings. Describe what you are feeling about those relationships and what you have observed about them. This can include how you observe their communication styles, how they share parenting commitments, the manner of support they give to each other and how they handle differences;

Step 4. Next compare your marriage with what you have identified in these other marriages;

Step 5. Then list the areas in your relationship that need improvement. Speculate as to what the likely outcome would be should either of you not participate in the identified changes. Then discuss the likely outcomes and relationship chances should you both embrace the changes identified;

Step 6. Now chat about the varied ways you, as individuals have handled past tricky times and situations. Discuss with your partner what they that was beneficial and unhelpful during those hard times;

Step 7. Discuss how you would like the relationship to be from this point on, how you want your partner to be, identify relationship goals, dreams and hopes;

Step 8. Ultimately, make an agreement with each other to totally commit to creating the sort of relationship or marriage to which you both want.

About the Author:

Chris Dawson is
a highly qualified marriage counselling expert, helping couples resolve
relationship problems. His extensive expertise, of over 25 years experience, is
highly sort after throughout the world in his role as Clinical Director for
Humaneed, a leading Service for Relationship and Marriage Counselling Melbourne,
Australia.